Kaz Update (The Final Frontier)

Monday 6/15
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In the NICU the doctors rotate patients. I don't know if this is to get a different perspective on your child's care or if it's a scheduling thing but this week Kaz's doctor tuned in to the song being sung about "reflux" and he too has determined, no this kid is not goin' home tomorrow. Instead they will continue to monitor Kaz and take it day by day. Maybe this weekend? Maybe they will put him back on the Reglan to help with his digestive system? We'll know more tomorrow.

To say that I'm relieved he's not coming home is an understatement. In one hand you want to be excited that he's finally coming home but in the other hand it sure would be nice if he stopped turning blue for a couple of days (you know, give us some semblance that life could be blue free and maybe I wouldn't have to use that infant CPR class I took). At first I felt bad for being so apprehensive about his homecoming but now that I have had a chance to breathe a sigh of relief, gather my senses, and look at the situation for what it is...really would anyone blame me for being a little (a LOT) nervous?

Tuesday 6/16

The OT came in today to take a looksy at Kaz's eating and see if she could help with his "blue" episodes and as a result the boy is now back on the Reglan and will start on a new formula with rice in it. Why? Well luckily he showed Alysse a little mini episode and she could see first hand that Reflux was probably the culprit to our feeding blues. Putting him on the Reglan should help of course and the formula is supposed to be great for babies who spit-up (Kaz spits up & turns blue...winner winner chicken dinner).

The OT also did a little developmental assessment of our boy wonder and he is A-ok for his gestational age and in fact he does excel at a couple of things (we are so proud). I got to see him do a little baby pull up; who knew his little preemie body was so capable. I guess we should give him more credit. Oh yeah, let me explain this "gestational age" thing. Yes he was born on 5/1 but really he hasn't been born yet. Confused? What it boils down to is the following math equation.

• Actual age - Days premature = Gestational Age.

In other words when Kaz is 6 months old gestationally/developmentally he will be 4 months old since he was 2 months premature. So when you look over and he's 12 months old and not walking please don't say, "OMG he's not walking yet?" Don't be surprised if my retort is something like the following. "NO, he's only 10 months old developmentally! Now back off Judgy McJudgerton!" Don't worry it won't be like this forever, eventually (usually by the age of 4) it all evens out. Aaron and I have decided that we won't utter the words, "oh honey it's because you are a preemie" to him. No crutches needed, suck it up.

One of the things that will be offered to Kaz to help with his development is therapy. The state of California offers certain preemies (in Kaz's case he was born less than 32 weeks and he was intabated) proactive developmental therapy to help circumvent any potential issues. Just because you go home doesn't mean you're in the clear but that's true of full term babies too isn't it. Preemies just have a little bit more of an up hill battle but I have faith Kaz will get a gold star, and not just for participating. He'll earn it!

What would you do if someone pryed open your eyes against your will with a metal device and then poked them? Might you hold your breath? Well Kaz did. He had an eye exam again and let's just say he didn't like it very much. Unfortunately he will need to have one more in a few weeks (it's a preemie on oxygen thang), shhh don't tell him.

Wednesday 6/17

Oma's (Grandma in Polish) in town. Fresh off the train from Wisconsin (seriously, she took a train). Ohhhhhhh Kaz was sooooo good today. No major events! That formula and Reglan must be doin the trick. He definitely put his best foot forward for his Oma. He was a wide eyed boy making cute little faces while his Oma held him for the first time. Lot's of tears were shed. It was pretty awesome. I wish I could have been there to see the look on Aaron's Mom's face while she watched her first born with his first born (they only allow 2 people at a time in the NICU to visit). Someone get me a tissue.

Special shout out to the Oma. Thank you for coming and we are SO happy to have you here!

Thursday 6/18

Whoa it's becoming more real today. Kaz is coming home soon. Today was a big day. The car seat test. When you see a baby taking the car seat test you know he or she is on their way out the door. They put the baby in their car seat for 2 hours to see if they can withstand the ride home from the hospital. Kaz passed with flying colors and he had no blue episodes to boot...should I be getting nervous? Obviously by the picture he's not nervous at all. He's totally enjoying his big boy car seat.

Friday 6/19

We strolled into the NICU to meet with the OT today who was kind enough to go over some exercises and activities we could do with Kaz to help with his development and although we knew it was comin we didn't know it was going to be today... the doc strolled up to us and said, "Well, is he pink enough to take home?" Did he just say we're taking our son home? O. M. GOSH he did! Wait a sec, it's only Friday. Is Friday considered the weekend? Wait we're not ready. I mean WE are ready. We are soooo ready to take our little guy home now but there a couple of items left on our to-do list.

• The ol' snipperoo needs to be done. Circumcision, no problem - Dr. Liberman is the man (according to EVERYONE we talked to) and conveniently available. Wait, should we have it done...should we not...time is of the essence...argh...will he resent us...will he miss it? I guess you can't miss what you've never had. Snip away Dr. Liberman! I like that according to the doc he's never received a complaint and when he was done he said it was a masterpiece. I wonder, will it be the Van gogh or Degas of penis'?
• We haven't hired Kaz's entourage for all his equipment. Oh well I guess we'll have to make due. Wow, now we've got to put all the training into practice. Jeesh I hope I remember how it all works.
• Formula! The boy's got to eat. Where will we find this magical formula?

Okay, it was a short list of "to-dos" I just went into a little tailspin there for a second. Again, WE ARE SOOOOOOOOOO READY. No really. All I asked was for a couple of days without a "blue" episode and he gave his momma exactly what she needed. Aaron and I just looked at each other and started smiling. We get to take our son home. We're not just going to be visitors anymore. We are going to be bonafied parents. I know this sounds crazy but it's kind of how a lot of NICU parents feel. I've had people say to me (in a snide jesting way), "This is where the real fun begins." I've experienced enough "fun" for now. I just want normal.

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This time when we left the hospital I DID take the wheel chair ride! I was so looking forward to this. I finally got to take the big momma pride ride. We swung by high risk to visit my favorite nurse Rea. A perfect ending to our long stay.

The car ride was surreal (much like most of this whole journey) and all I could think was, "oh boy what is Harley gonna do?" Those of you who know Harley (our fur baby) are very nervous right now reading this. So what did he do? Take a deep breath because he was great. Harley was very interested but we made him keep his distance and considering how crazy our dog can be he did very well meeting his lifetime buddy.

Ahhhh, we're home. We're a family. We're happy.

Saturday 6/20

Yay, we survived our first night! It wasn't as nightmarish as I heard it was suppose to be. In fact it would have been down right pleasant if poor Harley hadn't been throwin' up all night. Poor thing, seeking attention any way he can. Other than tending to the fur baby's yacking; Kaz slept and ate well and hardly fussed at all. Oh quit rolling your eyes (you know who you are) he will have us tearing our hair out in no time. Just let us have last night. For tomorrow will be filled with multiple doctor appointments, eye exams, respiratory exams, therapy, and the beeps bells and whistles of his very own machines that we will look forward to getting him off of someday. Ahhh but we'll always look back fondly at the first night we were all finally home.

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Sunday 6/21

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Happy Fathers Day! Aaron says now that he's a dad he's gotta sport this look, "the dad look" (watering his freshly cut lawn with a wife beater on while drinking a Pabst Blue Ribbon - Lord help me).

This will be my last daily entry for a while. Don't worry, I'll write again to keep you updated on how are little fella is doin'. We just wanted to say thank you for all your wonderful messages, thoughts, vibes, and prayers. They made all the difference in the world. I'm not just blowin' smoke or handing out empty accolades. You have no idea, we are so grateful!