July- Introducing Octonado

There was a lot blooming around here this past month, our family garden, personalities (literally), and levels of patience that we haven't even begun to weed and harvest.  That's just a fancy way of saying we are doing the best we can but there is a lot of work to do on our part.  Parenting is hard!  Parenting with patience when you have a eccentric, emotional, focused 4 year old and a CUTE 21 month old octonado is sometimes just plain comical.  There are times all we can do is laugh because it's so unbelievable.  All my friends with kids in high school and college, I know you're laughing too.  Unfortunately you are laughing at us and not with us.  Oh how the tables have turned.

Kaz

Kaz had his 4 Year Check-up and I am giddy/shocked to report...

Weight: 38 lbs. = 75th Percentile (say whaaaaat!)
Height: 40" = 50th Percentile

I look at this skinny boy and ask how is it possible that he's in the 75th percentile for weight and then I remind myself that muscle weighs more than fat and this kid thanks to some hardcore PT is ripped!  Look at that 6-pack!

How's that whole PT/OT thang shakin out?  It is quite amazing and awe-inspiring to watch your 4 year old tough it out and sweat laughing all the while.  OT is lots of fun and he is super eager and willing to have alllll the fun.  PT is fun but the boy breaks a sweat from working so hard and is exhausted sometimes to the point where he throws himself on the floor refusing to do one more climb or monkey bar exercise.  Sometimes I have to pull out the big guns and recite "The Little Engine that Could" to motive him.  Once I (yes ME) I had to do the monkey bars to coax him and you know what, it was fricken HARD.  When's the last time you did the monkey bars all the way across and held the bar for up to 20 seconds.  It aint easy my friends!  I have much respect for how hard this little guy works crossing them monkey bars 10+ times in a session after completing a vigorous obstacle course.

We have seen some wonderful results in a short amount of time.  It's little things you might take for granted that a kid of his age should typically be able to do.  Like climbing up a jungle gym and then being able to climb down (up is way easier than down), walking up and down a staircase using a reciprocal stepping pattern without falling (he is good at going up and getting better at going down - he REALLY has to concentrate), or drawing a happy face.  Kaz is becoming a little artist and is very proud of his creations.  It's a simple pleasure I didn't realize meant so much.
 
Sometimes with the good comes the bad.  Back in May I mentioned Sensory Integration Problems (SIP), this was something the OT recognized very quickly in Kaz's session.

"With appropriate interventions and time, most children develop needed central nervous system connections and sensory input starts getting more familiar and more comfortable. Not always, but most of the time, children can overcome their sensory problems, especially with parents who develop their own "sensory smarts."

As Kaz has grown more confident, familiar, comfortable and in control of his body we are now seeing the need to learn more about Sensory Processing Disorders (SPD) (aka SIP).  Why?  Well, why does Kaz scream when the vacuum or blender is on?  Why does he wipe my kisses away?  Why does he pretend to be a dragon and growl at people?  Why does he order people in the grocery store to be quiet?  Why does he have a thermal nuclear melt down when his sandwich is cut in squares rather than triangles?  While some of this is typical toddler/preschooler behavior some of it is an SPD indictor.  Why is this rearing it's ugly head now?  His NICU OT put it best when we saw her at the NICU reunion at the end of June.  Often when a child get's control of his physical being other things begin to surface. 

Oh how they've surfaced.  Now we are just doing our best to try to figure out how to recognize and help him, and us work through some of it.  We need to act now.  We let our fear (of the unknown) and hope (that it wasn't a "thing" and we were just being overly sensitive) delay getting him the OT/PT he needed.  I'm reading the Out-Of-Sync Child.  I read that it's a great book not only for parents of children with SPD but also for people who deal with children professionally; teachers, child care, and so on.  It's a very clinical read but it is giving me great insight on not only my child but other children I don't know and may have judged unfairly. 

I'm halfway through and I'm at the part in the book where I have to identify aspects of Kaz's everyday living and personality to categorize his type of SPD.  It's been sitting on the shelf for a couple of weeks now.  Who wants to categorize their child?  Who wants to find things "wrong" with him?  I know, there is nothing "wrong" with him it's just who he is.  Easy when the words on the page are not staring back at you about your sweet quirky boy.  Curious?  Take a look and click here.  The upside is not everything on this list applies, and there are things on it he used to do.  So the things he does today may be a thing of tomorrow with work, persistence, and understanding.

Alright then, what's your hang up?  Get over it and get going.  It's only going to help all of you in the long run.  Logically I know all this but here's the funny thing.  I have a confession (yet again.)  My hang up is you.  Ok not YOU but the you's of the world. 

You are not what you think you are.  You are not what others think you are.  You are what you think others think you are. 

What?  In other words it's the head tilt I think I'm gonna get.  It's the judgment I hear other people make of their "friends" and family.  FYI, usually people don't need your judgment because they are doing enough of that for themselves.  It's not fair but I'm being completely honest.  Well then don't say anything to anyone.  Here's the thing, silence is heavy.  When you're purposely silent you are saying something is embarrassingly wrong.  That is a heavy unnecessary load to carry.  When you live out loud people accuse you of "looking for attention."  No, you are hoping the more you say it the more normal it will become.  The lighter you will feel.  It will no longer be a "thing" it will just be. 

I'm getting better at mentioning Kaz is getting OT/PT and at first I felt compelled to justify it with the entire story.  Now I KISS (keep it simple silly) it and it has set me free to focus on all the good.

Self imposed limitations suck.  I don't want to suck so help me not suck okay.

Smiles

Ok, enough of that.  Look at this beautiful picture of my sweet caring boy.  He is becoming such a good sharer without any prodding from us.  At his check-up the doc checked his ears for jellybeans (whatever works) and as he pulled the 2nd jellybean from his ear he said, "Here Zane, you can have it."  Bring on the tears!  Whaaaat?  I couldn't help myself.  If you were there you would have too.  Even the doc got a little misty eyed!  Jeez and I can't even blame it on the hormones anymore!

Did he just say...?  Where do they get this stuff?  Little tape recorders they are.  Here are some of the funny things I heard this past month.

Thank you Daddy for this one.  Kaz responding to my "Oh My God" slip up:

"Momma, you are suppose to say Oh my goodness or oh my gosh and you are NOT supposed to say Oh sh*t."

Kaz using my words against me. 

Kaz: "If you don't I will be disappointed."

Me:  In my head/heard, "Ouch! My words hurt!"

I can still feel my heart racing after this one.

Kaz (with tears in his eyes): "Momma, turn off the human fire in my bedroom!" WTFrench? Me: "Oh the humidifier!" Exhale.

Kaz is really into his characters these days.  There are two specifically; Manpole (he's a one eyed alien) and Marianne (she has lot's of hands).  Both are aliens from one of his puzzles.  I'm telling you just in case you meet them.  I'm pretty used to these characters but the day he said this, 

Kaz: "I'm bringing 5 Aliens with me today!"

I'm not gonna lie, I was a little weirded out.  Then again, who am I to judge.  I used to walk around my neighborhood dressed like Pai Mei from Kill Bill.  Yup.  Apple...tree. 

Pics For Fun

1st Time flying a kite.

1st Coin Operated Toy Ride. 
Do you remember as a kid how
magical this experience was?
 Why?  Oh and it aint a quarter
anymore.  75 cents!

Really into shadows.



Look who jumped on the puzzle bandwagon.



Zane

Problem:  I want the cat and
they won't let me have it.
Solution: Problem?  Not for me!

Is an octonado.  He's an octopus with 8 hands swirling around in a tornado leaving destruction in his path.  You think I'm exaggerating.  You think I'm being dramatic.  I have seen him make seasoned parents quake in their boots.  Oh but he is a CUTE octonado!  Lucky for him.  I am amazed at how relentless he is.  How focused he is - there is no distracting him from what he wants.  How determined he is.  How much of a grinder he is.  I have been brought to tears!  With all that I am also delighted at how excited he is.  How adventurous he is.  How smart and cunning he is.  How sweet and loving he is...when I can catch him.

Firsts

Zane went swimming for the first time (with a vest on) and he has NO fear.  I don't need you!  And he doesn't!  It's both fun and frightening to watch.  He also experienced the slip n' slide for the first time and I am just in LOVE with this pic for so many reasons.  Lastly Zane took his first bubble bath.  Look at the sheer joy and relaxation on this child's face.  Don't you wish you felt like that all the time?

Latest Obsessions

• Babies:  He will hug a baby down!  He loves LOVES babies and has been known to almost assault a mother to get to a baby to show you just how much he loves him some babies.
• Sausage:  I can't even say the word out loud in his presence.  If you say it, you better have some.
• TV:  Relentless is an understatement.  How he contorts his body in protest of not getting what he wants can only be seen in a production of Cirque du Soleil.
• Pro-otic (Probiotic): It's impossible to forget to give Zane his probiotic.  He is on it and he will make sure you know he needs one.  It's his 1st 3 syllable word and he says it masterfully...unfortunately.
• Buses:  If you get in a car with Zane you better acknowledge EVERY bus unless you like the sound of a shrieking 21 month old screaming, "Mom!  MOMMA! MOOOOMMM!  BUUUUUSSS BUS BUSSSSS!" 
• Smell it:  I can't even believe I'm about to type this.  Yes, "smell it" has returned.  Reopening the doors to experiential learning, what was I thinking?

Pics For Fun

Check out that forked tongue!
Mmmm Hmm.

Night and Day
our 2 sons are.